Today

Today is my birthday.  It’s a bittersweet day as I lost a very close friend on this very day two years ago.  This was about a year and a half after I lost  my boyfriend whom i dearly loved.  I have lost too many men in my life and the memories keep flooding my mind today. For some reason the age of 44 is hitting me hard.  I don’t know why it’s just seems old.  Must be something from that timeline I set in my head when I was 15.   I  will be back to my chipper self tomorrow and it’s been a long day so I am headed to bed.

Dreaming

“Don’t dream your life, live your dreams” ~ Anonymous

I found this quote last year and I was going to use it in a post but i never did.  This weekend was both a balance for everyday life and dreaming.
I accomplished a lot of  of errands and checking things off my list this weekend. .    During a break on Friday I wrote down a list of things i wanted to get done over the weekend and for the long term.  I won’t bother you with the long term ideas.  Some of them were spurred by the books below, some where just thinking of things that needed to be done.
A few of the errands and projects were:
- change bed.  - oh my gosh i fluffed up my feather cushion and my 3 coverings and it now feels like heaven
- get knee highs.. – i like to sometimes dress up for work and i haven’t had any knee highs for a while and I miss the dressing up.
-return pop bottles.  I didn’t get this done.  There is a whole stack in the garage.  This will have to wait for another weekend.
- Bennet House Cross stitch – write down all the thread I still need.  I bought my self a Christmas present but the shop did not have all the thread I needed.  I needed to write down what i did have versus what I needed so i could stop by one day after work as it’s closer to work then home.
- buy a couple cheap pair of flip-flops.    Do you know how hard this is to do in the middle of January when you don’t want to go all over town and you don’t want to spend over 2 dollars a pair.    Its for a function at work and I found some at the dollar store that will just have to do   Tomorrow is National Feet day per my coworkers so we are are using that day  to tie in with the concept of Word of the Year.   We are giving all our coworkers paper cutouts of  flip flops to put down a word or “feat” they want to accomplish at work or in their personal life.  We thought we would get a live pair of flip-flops to pass out to the team leads to use as recognition when someone on their team accomplishes a grand “feat" in their department.
Well tonight I feel very accomplished.  I got  almost everything checked off my to do list.  I didn’t start any of the long term goals. but i have a plan in mind to get them done.
But the heading was about dreaming.  I did a lot of that this weekend to.   Both in sleep ‘:-)  and in day dreaming.
I have been in the mode of  reading of self help books lately.  Wait let’s not use those words.  I think exploring new ways of thinking is a better phrasing.  I needed something to be adding creativity and light to the gray days  of January.  The ones I have been reading are.
 







 












  
When I read these books I of course take them with a grain of salt.  I try to get a feel for the things they are saying.  They all have a common thread it seems.   Being positive and believing in what you want.   In fact they are very old ideas but it’s always refreshing to think of the ideas in new light. The Books  give me  new ways of how to apply the ideas to my own life.  The hindsight these books have brought have helped me realize this actions have been occurring in my life  and I hope to continue to use them as I strive to grow every day. I can honestly say that I have seen  awesome results of putting the  ideas into motion in my life in the past two years and even in bits and pieces from years before that.
Dreams..  This is where I started this post.  I dream all the time.  I dream of how i want to decorate, how i want to quilt, to design fabric.   How i want to live in a beautiful old house by the water.  How I want to travel.  How I want to have a delicious Italian dinner in Italy surrounded by Italians and savoring the food.     I dream of what I want  to be when i grow up.  I dream all the time.  I dream in color when i sleep and i dream while sitting in freeway traffic.   I dream when i write and when i sitting quiely working on stitching.
Another thing the books talk about is live your dreams. Work toward your dreams.    I am striving to do it this year.  I am always reminded about the lady who always saves her “pretty” things for a special occasion and when she died her children found things still tucked away and not used for years because daily life wasn’t special enough.    I want to take things out and use them. Both physical things and my dreams.   Every day is special and we are special and we should celebrate every day by using our “pretty” things.
P.S.   while out running errands this weekend I found this.   Doesn’t it bring joy?

Shall we explore a new series?

Enid Blyton

UFO # 5 for January

I am so excited.  I finished my  UFO early.    At this point in my life I am considering completion to the flimsy as completing my UFO.  Perhaps next year I will consider UFO’s from flimsy to complete.
In 2006 I participated in a block of the month exchange at the Shop Heart to Hand.  I received 13 squares.  The pattern was A Fathers Journey – which I think was an original design but I might be wrong.  I would occasionally take them out and try to figure out what to do with them but always came up empty.    At one point I even bought coordinating fabric to tie them all together.  A green, a goldish tan, a burgundy red flora and a dark blue.
Last year I could not get them out of my mind and I finally decided to do something out of them. I went through them and really looked at what I had.  All thirteen had the same piece of medium blue fabric in all of them and they also had a mixture of dark blue, light blue, tans and one had red and a few other oddities thrown in.   I can’t remember the original count but I determined that what I needed  was 5 dark, 5 light, 3 red and 3 neutrals and i had to do some resewing.  So I got to work and tore some of them apart, added other fabric that coordinated and made sure that the one fabric was in all of them. I think i did 14 of them and then had two more complete ones to sew up.
Last September I was house sitting and  I brought the project along.  I sewed the final two blocks and then started measuring the others and found they were not very accurate  and the seam ripper came out.
This is what I ended up with . 


Then I was stuck.   What was i going to do next?  I laid them out in all different order but could never find a good balance. I tried out all the fabrics as borders.   Nothing seemed to work.  Then inspiration struck.
i came up with a 5 set on point in a square.

I then I layed the remaining ones around the square but I had a couple of problems.  One.  I  was a square short but did not have any more of the fabric that was in all of them.  That was okay-  I used fabric that was in many of the others and hoped it didn’t stand out.
This is what it looks like.
    
The next problem was the square in the middle was slightly smaller then the outside square.  Inspiration left and i put it back in the box.  I took it home and asked my mom to help me deicide on borders.  Still no decision.
Then  I put it down on my UFO list and it was pulled for January.
I am house-sitting again so I brought it back out and I set down on Thursday night and put in a 4 hour session.
I was able to figure out a way to  showcase the difference between the two “squares”.   I then held it up against myself and it was too square and wasn’t long enough to use on the couch.  So I added another row on the top and the bottom of a neutral.   
I then cheated  (wink) on the last border.  I had borders already cut from another quilt that wasn’t used.  All I had to do was use two of them and just had to cut the two long sides.
Tada!!!  Sorry about the bad lighting it was at night.
   

Intentions – The listing

  As you know I have picked Intentions for my word to live by. When I picked the word I wasn’t exactly sure what “Intentions” i wanted so I have been thinking about it in the past few weeks.  I want to live my life by these intentions not just this year.  I want to mold my life to be what I dream.   I am going to list my Intention and then list a goal to achieve it for this year. So let’s begin.
1.  I want to be a Quilter and sew beautiful quilts.   

I have always been a quilter – since I was 18 years old.  This year I want to take it to a new level.
Goal:  Participate in the UFO challenge from Patchwork Times and complete the Block of the Month from Quilting Delight.

2.  I want to be healthy and fit.

I struggle with my weight.  Last year I was diagnosed with diabetes.  I did really well  and lost 45 lbs but then the holiday came and a bit of the weight creeped back on.
Goal: Go to the gym at least twice a week.
Goal: During the summer months (May though Sept)  – Go on a hike, walk  or bike ride weekly.
Goals:  Lose 5 lbs a month.  

3. I want to enjoy the monuments.

Life can get very busy and you can lose people very easily.  I know because it has happened to me.  I want to enjoy the moment.
Goal:  I don’t have a quantifying goal – but just to remind myself to take tame for myself either through reading, sewing or enjoying the beauty of everyday life.

4.  Be Queen of my home home.

Currently I live in a condo with my mother.  I want to move out and have my own space.  I have had to work through a lot of anxiety in the last year on the fincial front.   It’s finally possible to do it again and I am scared to fail.  The worst that can happen is fail and I have done that before and I have survived.
Goal:   Look at apartments.  The more I put it out in the universe – I know it will fall into place.

5.  Always Dream

I am always dreaming.  I dream about quilts i can make, things to sew,  books to write, furniture to remake, rooms to decorate and ideas to create.  I never want to stop dreaming.
Goal:  Write the outline and the first chapter of my book.
Goal: Paint a piece of furniture.
Goal:  Design a quilt pattern.

I really do believe in the power of goals.  These last few years have shown me how awesome I am.  This boasts me as I self doubt my self and I should know that I deserve all the happiness that I can make.  I have also learned the power of hard work and the results it can lead and I love how my life is so far.

What’s in the Stars?

Every year as a new year starts I like to read my “Horoscope”  Many years I have printed them out and put them in my journal book.   I would then through out the year read over them to see how well the fit my life.  Some times they reflected what was going on  but many times they don’t or it’s very vague but it always gives me a kick.
This year I decided to record them here. I have included the Yearly and the January predictions for love, work and a general overview.  Do they fit so far as of the 8th. They do a little. 
It’s all in good fun – so enjoy!!!

Year 2012 Overview

This is the year to come out of recent hiding, Aquarius. Saturn, your traditional ruler, will be making its way to your sector of fame and recognition this year, so get ready! Your standing in the world takes on great importance, especially during the latter half of the year. The total solar eclipse in November in your career sector is another huge catalyst to boost your professional status. Being born under the sign of fame, this spotlight is in keeping with your destiny, darling. It's time to come out of humble reclusion, and let yourself shine!
Jupiter spends the first half of the year in your home and family sector, placing the focus squarely on family dynamics and other long-buried issues. You'll gain many philosophical insights during this period about not only your roots, but your role in your family. This is a chance to expand your viewpoint on past events that have shaped who you are today. You may also find yourself in a more introverted and introspective space during the first half of the year until Jupiter enters your romance and pleasure sector in June.
Perhaps the best news is that foggy Neptune is finally leaving your chart in February, allowing you to see clearly - especially in your relationship to yourself. After perhaps suffering some serious disappointments and disillusionments over the past few years, you have started to doubt your ability to read people accurately. However, you'll no longer be under the influence of Neptune's illusory powers, so you'll be able to get back on track. But beware: Neptune will move into your money sector, potentially obscuring your ability to be spend within the bounds of your financial reality. The upside is that Neptune in your financial house could bring an inspiring and soulful means for you to earn money. The arts - film, dance, photography or painting, in particular - could play a bigger role in your income than in years past
Jan Monthly
There is a lovely, crackling kind of electricity in the air, as the year gets going on the 1st and 2nd. You have the sense that you're on the edge of a discovery, that you're ready for a new kind of internal freedom. Wow! What are you going to do with this wonderful energy? Sit down and write? Go out and jog? Paint a picture? Call a friend? Whatever you decide to do, you're going to make the right choice. You're in a deeply intellectual kind of place on the 7th. And somebody finds your intellectualism very, very attractive. This could turn into an awfully romantic moment! Just make sure you aren't getting in deeper than you can handle. Business deals must be handled with kid gloves on the 13th and 14th. If you don't have any kid gloves, warm wooly mittens will do. You can pretty easily bring people together on the 19th -- even if they have completely divergent worldviews. You can't be beat on the incredibly awesome 24th and 25th. Any dreams you've been nursing are sure to come to fruition now. Prepare your acceptance speeches! You want to help others on the 30th and you should go with that. Embrace the weird and the strange on the 31st. It will embrace you back!
 

Year 2012 Romantic

Your romantic sector can expect plenty of planetary action in 2012, bringing an abundant supply of love and pleasure. Venus will be visiting this corner of your chart for an extended stay between April and August. During Venus's retrograde period between May and June, you may enter a period of reflection and reconsideration over recent romantic developments; you may also encounter unexpected reunions with lovers from your past. In any case, you'll be revisiting sweet memories of love to remind you where you've come from - and help direct you where your love life is going!
The new Moon solar eclipse in mid May will make a strong imprint on the love sector of your horoscope for the duration of the year. The effects of the eclipse will be revealed as an unfolding of events during 2012's second half, all having to do with romantic matters. Current relationships could develop quite quickly, causing a bit of a whirlwind in your heart. When Jupiter joins your love house in June, this will only amplify the power-of-love theme.
Although you often pride yourself on being rather detached and objective, you could find yourself swept up in the drug of love before 2012 is finished with you. But with two of the most benefic planets blessing the romantic house of your horoscope during the second half of 2012, how can you go wrong? Enjoy your fate as a hopeless romantic without having to suffer the tragedy of unrequited love. If anything, you'll be the one turning down offers!
Jan Monthly
A super hot affair is potentially in the works for you as the year gets going on the 1st and 2nd. Did your eyes lock across the dance floor as midnight struck? Or did you notice each other at the coffee shop? Do they have that special something that you just can't resist? Are you available? Did you get their number? Oh, my! What an exciting start to the New Year! You're using your brain on the 7th. How's your heart doing? Be very, very careful as you conduct any romantic negotiations on the 13th and 14th. After all, everybody's got a hungry heart. If you don't have what it takes to feed theirs, let them down easy. A casual get-together could turn very romantic on the 19th. You're irresistible on the 24th and 25th. And they wouldn't resist you if they could! Pay attention to your dreams on the 30th. They might be a big help in sorting out how you really feel about everything that's going on right now, romantically. Try something way, way off the beaten track when it's time to choose a spot to have dinner on the 31st. It will pay off!
 

Year 2012 Career

This promises to be a stellar career year for Aquarius - your star is clearly rising! You've been in a bit of a gestation period for the past few years, but now you're getting ready to unveil your genius. Though 2011 may have felt like a bit of a stalemate for you, you'll soon realize that you were simply collecting experiences, ideas and dreams that will all be put to good creative use this year. Saturn will be sitting strong at the zenith of your chart for the next few years beginning in October. Under Saturn's tutelage in your career house, you'll be applying the proper focus, discipline and follow-through necessary to make things happen. Your time has come!
While Mars is retrograde until April, you may still be holding your cards closer to your vest as the incubation period continues. But with Mars powering up your sector of resources and other people's money for such an extended period (the first six months of the year), you should have no trouble asking people for backing you might need to get your larger-than-life plans off the ground. You'll be highly resourceful during the first half of 2012, so take advantage of your innate networking skills - they will most definitely pay the bills!
Come springtime, your projects will go off the charts. November's total new Moon solar eclipse in Scorpio will further trigger amazing events in your career house over the latter part of 2012. Themes of death and rebirth - as well as a total transformation of how you approach your career - are certain to emerge, and you'll be required to possess much more power in your chosen field. Do you see yourself as a key player, a leader and a pioneer? Hopefully so, because you're about to be called upon to step into the biggest shoes of your life. No playing small! This is your year to see and be seen, Aquarius
Jan Monthy
Discovery is your keyword on the 1st and 2nd. There's electricity in the air and your brain is working overtime! You need to keep your eyes open for whatever it is that the universe wants to show you this month, then be alert to ways in which you can use that information! If you think about it and decide that what you really want in your career is the opportunity to help people, then get to work on that on the 6th. Approach your boss with your thoughts on the 11th. You'll really make some progress on the 13th, and that will make you feel good! Get in a jog on the 18th. Think it over carefully on the 20th: What's your biggest goal? Why not focus a bit on the bread-and-butter of your career on the 24th? Is it time to think about taking a special class? Learning another language? Gaining a new skill? Sounds good! On the 30th, you're feeling pretty charitable, again. Go ahead and think way, way out of the box on the 31st. That unexplored territory is where you'll find everything you need to make a real go of your wackiest, most out-there ideas.
 

New Years Day Sewing

They say what you do on New Years Day you will be doing the rest of the year.   This year I decided to get some sewing in so I cut out the squares I need for my Provence Quilt.   I am trying a new way to post the photos.  I don’t know if i will do it every time but it’s fun to experiment.

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Happy New Year

Hope everyone has an awesome year.  I have goals and wishes that I want to accomplish in 2012.  We will do it!!!